This is a work in progress, but I wanted to at least make a start in writing about the three cornerstones of who I strive to be.
- Being present: Focusing on the right kind of thinking, for example, not regretting the past or living in fear of the future. Being present means not letting the experience of the moment slip by because I’m caught in thinking about the past or the future, obsessing over what-if scenarios, etc. It means getting into deep connection with what is actually observable, both externally in the world and internally in my psyche.
- From being present, I can stay balanced (equanimity), have accurate observations, and make clear discernment regarding my feelings.
- At the same time, I strive to develop the skills to enter into a place of non-resistance, non-judgement, and non-attachment. I am not resisting the future, I am not judging the present, I am not attached to the past.
The above comes out of Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now and A New Earth. From there,
- Feelings are experienced fully and in the present
- Needs are discerned
- After consideration of those needs, requests or actions are taken
This comes from Marshall Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication.
The third aspect of the triangle comes from Rudolf Steiner’s Anthroposophy, which is vast and from which I take only a small fragment for this diagram:
- Looking at the needs that I have discerned and determining if they are coming from a place of the lower ego (distrust, selfishness, anger, guilt, shame, etc)
- Returning to the present to transform the lower ego needs
- If coming from the higher ego (compassion, love, forgiveness, empathy, etc), expressing or acting on those needs.
That’s about as clear as I can say it at the moment–it doesn’t feel completely clear, but at least it’s a start!